look over there! oh, wait, what's that… ooh, hello!

I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling "I've not done enough" with my life so far.  What happened to all those dream?

But they were more than dreams.  They were realities. So what happened?  And when? And how?

When does an ambition morph into a hobby?  That's a bit sad, isn't it?

How are we supposed to decide what to focus on in *this* lifetime?

It seems this whole train of thought is one of those all-important areas in life that no one prepares you for!  And that's ok.  I'm just saying.

So over Christmas 2013 I started seriously thinking about the things i didn't want to slip away, the things i wasn't going to let fade, melt and slip between the cracks of 21st Century 'life'.

For me, this means making time - and yes, a conscious effort - to explore/get back into the following:

Music making 

Shaking things up with different software. using a different DAW, being faster & looser - less precious, *posting* stuff.

(Oh, and by the way, do please message me if you can recommend a good book on Orchestration/frequencies?)

Arduino

Circuitry tinkering, making bots, etc. (We're going on holiday in March.  My first thought after my other half told me it was booked was "who's going to feed the cat?". My second thought was "well, I know I could. By text. So why not?)

Photography

Trying new things - equipment, styles, an exhibition? why not? Why *didn't* I do it two years ago?

Creative writing

Writing 'that novel'. I'm halfway through hammering out the first 50,000 word draft.  And no, i have no idea what it is about. Yet.  As I told someone last week "it hasn't told me yet". (And yes, i cringed too.)

A coffee blog/notebook

What was that amazing coffee I was drinking late last summer that tasted of burnt marzipan and had an aftertaste of peppery confusion? Where did i buy it from? Where was it farmed? I wonder how that farmer's family are…

So that's enough to be getting on with for the next 315~ days, right? Hmm.  I was talking to a dear friend about this recently and he's going through a similar process, I think. But admirably, he's far less 'dictatorial' with himself than I am. But we both agree that it doesn't matter what, how, when, as long as you keep trying - by which I think we both  meant *doing*.

Not in a 'room full of monkeys at typewriters' way, but….well, maybe one monkey.

Anyway.

I'll be posting random updates here.

Probably sporadically.

Hopefully frequently.

Almost certainly not regularly.

Be happy and well, whoever & wherever you may be.

Love from The London.

4 x 4 (part 1)

we can all get too lazy & comfortable.

we can all make excuses. i know i'm always making excuses for not getting things done.

so, as i have Monday off, i thought i'd try an experiment...

record 4 new tracks in 4 days. one a day. not that scary. everything new - no working from old ideas. no finishing off old songs. these will be 4 new tracks written n' recorded on the fly.

to make it a little more interesting, i thought i'd use the following times:

day 1 - friday - today: 1m 11secs
day 2: 2m 22secs
day 3: 3m 33 secs
day 4: 4m 44 secs

i've just finished track 1. you can find it here if you're curious.

'enjoy'.

oh, and have a great weekend!

multi-media instrumental

i've been playing with this tune for the last few hours. it's still very raw, messy and not yet fully formed.

for once, i'm at a complete loss for lyrics that suit it.

you know when you're writing and you can feel 'something' coming, 'something' brewing, but you don't know what; because 'it' doesn't know what 'it' is itself yet?

same thing.

and that's half the fun.

anyway, for some reason - maybe an aching for narrative - i decided to try dragging it into imovie and dropping random photos in.

i think it works.

sort of.

maybe.

it's my first (maybe last) attempt.

thought i might as well share.

seemed a shame to just leave it sitting on the hard drive.

'enjoy'.


(you can see it a bit bigger here, if you really want to.)

testing...testing...the old man is snoring...

Most Saturday mornings, if I'm lucky and if diaries allow, I kick-start my weekends with Saturday morning coffee with my dear friend Mr B.

These usually start with sleepy mumbled twittery, until we meet, with practically silent acknowledgement, atop one of London's most beloved bookstores, where coffee and laughter swiftly ensue.

This morning was a bit different.

In a good way. A very good way.

You see, Mr B is a very interesting man. He says interesting things. He works on interesting things. He is also a very patient man, which is a wonderful quality to have, if you happen to be talking to me....about interesting things.

In recent months, we've frequently stopped and said what an interesting podcast our chats might make. We did it again today.

And as if by magic (or rather, the magical facilitation of the iPhone), we soon started recording. (Or rather, as Mr B spoke on, I sneakily downloaded and jump started the marvellous iTalk iPhone app. Luckily he just chuckled when he noticed the big green light on my iPhone.)

The sound quality is wonderful. The ambience of background music, cluttering crockery, etc, just add to a wonderful conversation, casually captured. In my opinion.

Considering we let it roll on as we nattered and strolled for 42mins through the book store, the 100 odd mb barely dented the usually sensitive iPhone battery.

I've emailed a compressed copy to Mr B and we're going to try an edit each, but are still excited that what we got was pretty good.

Next time, going forward, we'll try more constraints. Probably recording at home, with freeflowing coffee, pre-ordered notes, more forgiving surroundings and probably an SM58. If i get my way.

Topicwise, I'm guessing we'll stick to what we know; social media, governmental social media, books, music, etc...

All of which will continue to make us laugh loudly and sporadically, I'm sure.

I'll let you know how we get on.

Have a great weekend.

-- Post From My iPhone

Sifting The Soul From The Chaos...

You may recall seeing a rather excited post from me here a couple of weeks ago. It was written - and posted - on a Saturday morning, hours before a friend of mine was due to come over for the afternoon. An afternoon we had planned to spend recording, building, racketeering, deconstructing, constructing, re-constructing, creating, making. Great things.

Well, sadly - and as a few of you now know - that's not quite what the universe had in store for us that afternoon.

We got off to a furious n' glorious start. Everything we did, every idea we had, seemed inspired. And maybe it was. We were fuelled and inspired. We burned bright that afternoon.

But you know what they say about the candle that burns twice as bright...

...due to (sadly avoidable and unnecessarily) unforeseen circumstances, the afternoon ground to a heartbreaking halt after only a few hours.

I was absolutely gutted. And angry. And worried. And truly exhausted. I had tried to keep up, but I couldn't.

In fact, I was (and am still) so upset by how the afternoon was stolen from us, that it wasn't until earlier this evening that I was able to bring myself to have a brief, awe-struck, melancholic listen to what we recorded that afternoon. It's an almighty mess. A cacophony of lunacy. A bag of blagged ideas. But there are some gorgeous moments, lines and riffs too. It'll take more than a few upsetting hours to trawl through the wreckage, but I will. And soon. But slowly, for these things are riddled with memories and moments.

And memories and moments are where the beautiful poisons lie...

Looking at the recordings, I'm reminded of the day I walked into a studio; the morning after a mad italian punk band had spent the night in there. (I think they'd won a competition, you know the scenario; best demo wins 12hr recording session, blah, blah blah...). The place was a riot of wreckage and riffs. I remember my heart going out to the engineer who had had to hold the whole session together, and then make something of it. He looked utterly traumatized.

I identify with him a little now, as I look at the wreckage on my screen.

Panning.

Prospecting.

Sifting the soul from the chaos...

I had lunch with that friend today. He was cripplingly apologetic. I smiled and gently asked him not to waste his energy apologising and worrying. We are friends. And every soul on this crazy ride has his/her own path n' challenge. Their own mission, their own beast to slay. End of conversation.

We agreed that we got off to a storming start. We were on fire. But things happened, and - poor chap - his demons took over. We might try again. We might not. Not everything needs to be set in stone.

I want to pull a few versions of the track, a track, something - whatever it was that happened that afternoon - together. For him. For me. To show him that as horrific as it all got, nothing is ever, totally in vain.

There is always beauty in the horror. Just as there is always horror in beauty...

When i have found, cleaned, washed, loved and cared for it - if there's anything left - I will share it with you.

2+2=5

Today, something quite exciting is happening. I'm taking part in my first collaboration for (counting...) at least eleven years...

A fellow songwriting friend is coming over at 1pm this afternoon. We've long spent coffee and lunch breaks talking about our ongoing writing & recording; excitedly discussing our weekend's work, consoling each other when we've hit creative brick walls; offering technical & creative solutions; challenging the other's (mis)conceptions about what could and should be done within a particular track, lyrically, orchestrally, technically, etc... We've swapped CDs on a Monday morning, desperate to hear something fresh, something new, something other than the track we've spent the weekend alone with; but falling back in love with our own work all over again, when we see the look on someone else's face when they hear it...for the first time...

Anyway, after months of talking about it, we're finally writing & recording something new together. We've talked about it for so long, but always in loose words, as a nebulous idea. would we start with one of 'his' tracks? One of mine? Something new? But then, would we both feel pressure?

It's not 'just' sitting down to create with someone else. It's not just someone else seeing you as you 'really' are; in your truest habitat; it's allowing someone all access, all trust, all influence in that place; while you are going through the process. Together.

Talk about terrifying and exciting.

We finally decided to do this, i think, partly because we both seem to have fallen into a period of creating and playing with loops. We've both been listening to lots more cinematic music than usual. (And anyway, i've long been a sucker for strings n' beats, as anyone who knows me knows.) We've both recently 'discovered' bands like Sigur Ros. And we both want to push our personal envelopes and rid ourselves of our personal comfort zones.

We both crave escape from our self imposed Little Empires...

So. The deal was that during the week just passed, we'd both start. I'd start creating loops and ideas within a 70bpm, Em framework. Nick has been working in a 140bpm, Dm set up. In about 2hrs, he'll knock on my door, with a CD of his loops in his pocket. We'll sit down, import them into my existing project and start piecing it all together...

Then, we'll fire up all the toys. The Alesis SR-16 drum machine; the Jen SX1000 synthtone, an ancient, wooden-framed 70's beast (which i'm convinced was the only machine used to soundtrack every episode of Dr Who - ever), and many more... Also joining the party, will be various guitars, basses, percussion instruments and probably some abstract vocal noises.

Oh, and an electric razor. (trust me - better than an e-bow on an electric guitar!)

And then, maybe, after hours of tinkering, laughter and noise; we might potter out of the proverbial shed with something quite interesting...

Whatever happens, I'm going to have a seriously fun afternoon. I hope you do, too!